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You are here: Home / Explore / NIkki’s Notes: The End is a New Beginning

NIkki’s Notes: The End is a New Beginning

By Know-it-All Nikki Leave a Comment

I normally don’t like endings; like the ones from books or movies. When I read a book I really love, I don’t want it to end. I want the story to keep unfolding, I want to know what’s next. The same goes for movies; unless there’s a sequel (like Marvel Movies or Star Wars), once it’s over you have to leave the theater or if you’re Gen X like me, rewind the VHS tape. If it was a sad movie, you’re left with all the feels and those can linger for days!

But sometimes it’s good to have an ending, a finale. This week I came to the end of something that may seem insignificant to some but to me? 13 years ago it was MY beginning to blogging. This week I made the conscious decision to let my first domain, the one that started it all… EXPIRE.

shock. clutching pearls

Y’all. I’m fine with it. It was time. I rebranded a few years ago and even then, I knew one day I’d have to move on from Chaos in the Country, I just didn’t know when or quite how to do it. But I’m genuinely happy I did. It feels like I just lost 50 pounds.

Of course I exported the entire site and all its content. Some of it still lives here in the archives, or it may live somewhere else in the future. There are 13 years of content to sift through so I’m taking my time and really looking at what will be useful as I move forward.

A couple of years ago I thought I had come to another end when I reached the point in motherhood where I no longer had little ones run around the house. With my youngest now 13 years old and probably a good five inches taller than me, it felt like my days of bedtime stories and playing pretend was something I’d have to wait until I had grandchildren to do again. However, this week we added a new member to the family when I became an emergency foster parent. And honestly? My heart is so full.

“Let’s take a picture of my Lego weapons.”

This is something I never thought I’d do, trust me! But I knew a family who needed this and when they asked, I ran to OCS and began the process. I didn’t even stop to think twice. We are already very familiar with the family and I know in my heart this is something I am meant to do for them. I can’t say much more other than now begins the process of becoming a licensed foster parent. The hubby and I discussed it at great lengths and he agreed. Have I ever told you that I have the most patient husband? He has to be to be married to me!

So here we are, back in the trenches of bedtime stories, big imaginations, even bigger giggles, and Legos.

How was your week? Anything exciting to share? 

Filed Under: Explore, Nikki's Notes Tagged With: blogging journey, family, mom bloggers

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Hi there!

I’m Nikki and I’m thrilled to have you here. I’m powered by a good chai latte, loads of chocolate, and humor. Here at Know-it-all Nikki, I dish up honest conversations about life with adult congenital heart disease and mental health. I also share my love of books, knitting, midlife, and life after divorce. So, pull up a seat and grab a beverage. Let’s spill some tea, have a lot of laughs, and a few good cries. To learn more about what makes me tick, CLICK HERE

knowitallnikki

#writer 📲 #Binder #bookblogger #Knitter 🐑 💙 #chd #ACHD #TGA📧 hello@knowitallnikki.com 📸 ©️ @knowitallnikki


Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise.
.
.
.
.
#c

Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise.
.
.
.
.
#charliesworld #catstagram #instacats #catsofig #housecatlife


Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventi
Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventing me from filling it out, but he IS laying on the stickers I need to fill in the days and dates.
.
.
.
.
#charliesworld #instacats #catsofinstagram #catsofig #housecatlife catstagram


The world is falling apart.
The world is falling apart.


Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest
Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest. I've been trying to figure out how to write this for 2 months now and I still don't know if I got it right.
.
.
.
#knowitallnikkimovestoohio #dtga #heartmonth #ACHD #adultchdsurvivor


Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting
Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting Impact) and day 5 (How We Monitorthe Heart)! But it's fine! Because they both fit nicely for today's adventures which consisted of a carotid artery ultrasound (day 5) and a series of messages between myself and @nationwidekids to discuss how best to approach the weight loss struggle (day 4). 🤨😠

But it also ties in beautifully with day 6 of #heartmonth, #choosingjoy because despite all of the crap that goes along with being an adult with CHD, I am genuinely joyful. Some of comes out in sarcasm but I've told people if I'm not cracking jokes or inserting some token sarcasm into the day, then something is truly wrong. The last 2 years have been hard, but believe me when I say, I AM HAPPY and I'm wearing red today!
.
.
.
.
#ACHD #congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #WearRedforHeartMonth


I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth i
I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth is #lifebetweenappointments 

Yeesh, where do I start? Right now my life between appointments is a little chaotic. The number of appointments has increased a thousand fold than what I was used to growing up.  There are more appointments now than I had when I was pregnant with all four kids!

I struggle to keep them straight or where they're going to be. I write them down in a paper planner, my wall calendar, and my phone's calendar. And I still wind up looking them up multiple times because I don't trust my brain's ability to recall.

I'm expected to write down detailed symptoms. I don't recognize symptoms as symptoms. It just feels like a Tuesday to me. But do try to have a normal life, the docs encourage: eat right, be active, get sleep. How do I do that and not wonder if what I'm feeling while I'm trying to be normal is a symptom?
.
.
.
.
#heartfailure #congestiveheartfailure #congenitalheartdefect


Waiting.
.
.
.
#catsofinstagram #charliesworld #in

Waiting.
.
.
.
#catsofinstagram #charliesworld #instacats #catsofig #catstagram


Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I c
Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I can say, is sometimes motivation feels like the end of a very long tunnel; a pinprick of light in an otherwise black abyss. Motivation eludes me more than I care to admit. When it feels unattainable I feel like the little girl I used to be, opening my eyes in a pitch black room, are my eyes actually open? Making my way across the room, arms outstretched, hoping I don't run into anything, or worse, fall. 
And then other times, like on this Monday, motivation arrives and it feels easy, like a special occasion you'vebeen waiting for. So you wear the anatomical heart earrings your daughter bought you and you don the gifted knit heart cowl your knitty BFF made for you and for a day you feel normal.
.
.
.
.
#congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #congestiveheartfailure #dtga


Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I st
Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I still think it's silly to only give one day, one month, or even one week to talk about heart disease. Alas, here we are. 

I'm going to do my best to follow the 28 daily prompts for #heartdisease and #chdawareness but I make no promises.

Today's prompt is #BeyondtheDiagnosis. To me, looking beyond being born with a CHD means a few things:

It's the invisible things that can't be measured on a chart, like the fatigue, sadness for the health I wasn't born with, and the mental math of asking myself if I have enough energy for all I want to get accomplished in a week, or even a day.

It's being seen as a whole person; not the condition the doctors are treating. This a part of me, not all of me. I'm still a parent, friend, writer, a hopeless romantic. Yes, I'm a heart patient, I ALWAYS will be, but I'm also opinionated, stubborn, funny, and a person with real feelings. 

But most of all it's refusing to be reduced to number in the healthcare system, or someone else's discomfort.
.
.
.
#chdawareness



Follow on Instagram


knowitallnikki

#writer 📲 #Binder #bookblogger #Knitter 🐑 💙 #chd #ACHD #TGA📧 hello@knowitallnikki.com 📸 ©️ @knowitallnikki

Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise. . . . . #c Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise.
.
.
.
.
#charliesworld #catstagram #instacats #catsofig #housecatlife
Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventi Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventing me from filling it out, but he IS laying on the stickers I need to fill in the days and dates.
.
.
.
.
#charliesworld #instacats #catsofinstagram #catsofig #housecatlife catstagram
The world is falling apart. The world is falling apart.
Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest. I've been trying to figure out how to write this for 2 months now and I still don't know if I got it right.
.
.
.
#knowitallnikkimovestoohio #dtga #heartmonth #ACHD #adultchdsurvivor
Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting Impact) and day 5 (How We Monitorthe Heart)! But it's fine! Because they both fit nicely for today's adventures which consisted of a carotid artery ultrasound (day 5) and a series of messages between myself and @nationwidekids to discuss how best to approach the weight loss struggle (day 4). 🤨😠

But it also ties in beautifully with day 6 of #heartmonth, #choosingjoy because despite all of the crap that goes along with being an adult with CHD, I am genuinely joyful. Some of comes out in sarcasm but I've told people if I'm not cracking jokes or inserting some token sarcasm into the day, then something is truly wrong. The last 2 years have been hard, but believe me when I say, I AM HAPPY and I'm wearing red today!
.
.
.
.
#ACHD #congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #WearRedforHeartMonth
I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth i I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth is #lifebetweenappointments 

Yeesh, where do I start? Right now my life between appointments is a little chaotic. The number of appointments has increased a thousand fold than what I was used to growing up.  There are more appointments now than I had when I was pregnant with all four kids!

I struggle to keep them straight or where they're going to be. I write them down in a paper planner, my wall calendar, and my phone's calendar. And I still wind up looking them up multiple times because I don't trust my brain's ability to recall.

I'm expected to write down detailed symptoms. I don't recognize symptoms as symptoms. It just feels like a Tuesday to me. But do try to have a normal life, the docs encourage: eat right, be active, get sleep. How do I do that and not wonder if what I'm feeling while I'm trying to be normal is a symptom?
.
.
.
.
#heartfailure #congestiveheartfailure #congenitalheartdefect
Waiting. . . . #catsofinstagram #charliesworld #in Waiting.
.
.
.
#catsofinstagram #charliesworld #instacats #catsofig #catstagram
Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I c Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I can say, is sometimes motivation feels like the end of a very long tunnel; a pinprick of light in an otherwise black abyss. Motivation eludes me more than I care to admit. When it feels unattainable I feel like the little girl I used to be, opening my eyes in a pitch black room, are my eyes actually open? Making my way across the room, arms outstretched, hoping I don't run into anything, or worse, fall. 
And then other times, like on this Monday, motivation arrives and it feels easy, like a special occasion you'vebeen waiting for. So you wear the anatomical heart earrings your daughter bought you and you don the gifted knit heart cowl your knitty BFF made for you and for a day you feel normal.
.
.
.
.
#congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #congestiveheartfailure #dtga
Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I st Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I still think it's silly to only give one day, one month, or even one week to talk about heart disease. Alas, here we are. 

I'm going to do my best to follow the 28 daily prompts for #heartdisease and #chdawareness but I make no promises.

Today's prompt is #BeyondtheDiagnosis. To me, looking beyond being born with a CHD means a few things:

It's the invisible things that can't be measured on a chart, like the fatigue, sadness for the health I wasn't born with, and the mental math of asking myself if I have enough energy for all I want to get accomplished in a week, or even a day.

It's being seen as a whole person; not the condition the doctors are treating. This a part of me, not all of me. I'm still a parent, friend, writer, a hopeless romantic. Yes, I'm a heart patient, I ALWAYS will be, but I'm also opinionated, stubborn, funny, and a person with real feelings. 

But most of all it's refusing to be reduced to number in the healthcare system, or someone else's discomfort.
.
.
.
#chdawareness
Follow on Instagram

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