• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
Know-it-all Nikki
  • Knit
  • My Heart
  • Read
  • Explore
    • Alaska
    • Depression and Anxiety
    • Life
    • Monday Motivation
    • Nikki’s Notes
    • Recipes
You are here: Home / Nurture Thyself / Surprising things I made myself do in 2017

Surprising things I made myself do in 2017

By Know-it-All Nikki Leave a Comment

Well friends, it’s about that time of year again. The time when we reflect on 2017 and analyze how well or bad it treated us. In some instances, this also means it’s time to reflect on how well or bad we treated it.

As I sit here in my office and take a look around, I’m realizing that 2017 didn’t suck as bad as I thought it was going to. One of my unspoken goals for this year was to find the happy in things. I didn’t really share it or speak it because I knew it had to come from within myself.

That became a true test when I found out I was in heart failure and Afib. It became even more of a test when I feared our landlord was selling the house we renting out from under us (he was). It was also Afib that put a few things in perspective for me. I’m telling ya, a jolt to the heart can really reset your perspective on things. 

A look back at 2017

I learned to let go of the things I couldn’t control.

I won’t lie, that is a daily struggle for me. Every. Damn. Day. I’m not a control freak but I like to know what’s going on; if I were a superhero I’d want my super power to be to see into the future or what others are thinking.

I started planting roots

Believe me, no one was as surprised as me when we bought a home here. Sometimes I still wake up in the morning and ask myself if this is my home. And every morning I answer yes.

There have been moments when a twinge of sadness seeps in. I let sadness speak her piece, feel it with my whole heart and then send her on her way.

The only trouble I’ve found with planting these roots is that I have no idea what it will grow into. I suppose that will depend on how I tend to it. If we’re being honest, I don’t have the best green thumb.  But so far I’ve given it love and space and as much sunshine as Alaska allows.

2017 year in review

I forced myself to detach from the things that stressed me.

I quit my job at the paper because I knew that I wasn’t ready to return to work. I knew that even though my boss had “retired”, it wouldn’t change the job itself and THAT was really the problem.

  • Detaching from the stress even included detaching from social media. I’ve been working in digital media in one form or another since 2000 and even on the best days, it can drain you. Sometimes, it feels like it’s sucking your soul right out of you.
  • I had to unfollow some friends for awhile. I needed a detox from their social interactions. Things that brought me great joy about them also stressed me to no end. I couldn’t simply scream, “stop posting that!” because the posted things I couldn’t control.
  • I walked away from hot button topics too. This basically meant ALL POLITICS. Look, I know we have an giant Orange Baboon in the Oval for the foreseeable future and I’m as upset, maybe even more so than many people I know. I didn’t take my fight or outrage to social media because that’s not something I wanted to shove at other people. I made a very conscious decision to keep my social networks free from drama and politics.

I dipped a toe back into freelancing

I knew I couldn’t NOT work. I had to. So once I walked away from the job at the paper, I began freelancing again on a part time basis. My first project back into freelancing was a good one. While it ended at the end of October, it gave me clarity on what I absolutely didn’t want to do as a freelancer. I gained insight and it reconfirmed that writing and blogging is where I belong.

Freelancing was a goal of mine for 2017, even though it’s a slow go, I’m thrilled to say that it’s actually going.

I’m working on taking better care of me

Emotionally and physically 2017 has been a roller coaster. My most recent echo cardiogram shows that I’m still in heart failure. The bright side is that it hasn’t gotten worse; it just hasn’t improved from June. I’m choosing to see this as a positive thing.

Don’t panic, I already have two appointments set up for the new year. One with a new cardiologist and one with Dr. Twitchy, the EP doctor.

Taking care of myself physically and emotionally means I must learn my limitations. I nap when I need to and I don’t beat myself up for it. I delegate so that the biggest concerns I have are what to make for dinner and meeting my deadlines.

I’ve never freelanced with heart failure before (at least I don’t think I have), so I’m learning to look at productivity differently. When you start paying attention to how you truly feel physically, and acting on it instead of ignoring it, you discover how to be your best self and your best boss.

When I look at the start of 2017 and what I wanted, I realize that yes… I did become a Queen. I WON.

I continued to strive for positivity over negativity and I took care of ME. (Mad props to the congenital heart defect for that one).

I’m wrapping up this year with a newfound sense of peace and clarity. It’s probably the first time that’s ever happened to me. (I’m taking no shame in thanking the anti-depressants for that.)

When you look back at this year, what does it make you feel? Relief? Sadness? Peace? I hope it’s the latter.

Filed Under: Nurture Thyself Tagged With: 2017, congenital heart defect, goals, new year

Affiliate Disclosure

Know-it-All Nikki is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

*Posts containing affiliate links will always be disclosed.

Previous Post: « Be Everyone’s Favorite this Christmas with an HP Sprocket 2-in-1
Next Post: Desperately Seeking Peaceful Social Networks »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

Hi there!

I’m Nikki and I’m thrilled to have you here. I’m powered by a good chai latte, loads of chocolate, and humor. Here at Know-it-all Nikki, I dish up honest conversations about self-care and mental health. I also share living with a congenital heart defect, my love of books, knitting, midlife, and life as a Buckeye exploring The Last Frontier. So, pull up a seat, grab your tea, and let’s spill some tea, have a lot of laughs, and a few good cries. To learn more about what makes me tick, CLICK HERE

knowitallnikki

This could be very exciting! . . . . . #achd #crit This could be very exciting!
.
.
.
.
.
#achd #criticalcongenitalheartdefect #dtga #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #pacemakerlife #chdawareness #afibawareness #heartfailure #1in100 #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #achdvoices #chdawareness
I didn't think i would need a laptop today. Turns I didn't think i would need a laptop today. Turns out I was slightly wrong. Prepared as always with all my electronics, I'm thankful my kindle was fully charged as was the keyboard because my tablet definitely wasn't... Sure, I have pen and paper but that's for brainstorming! I was also in need of my favorite chai!
.
.
.
.
.
#mrandmrssmithmovetoalaska #writer #passionplanner #PashFam #passionplannerambassador #mentalhealth #knowitallnikkihasadhd #amwriting #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #welcometomymobileoffice
Almost an hour later we are finally boarding. This Almost an hour later we are finally boarding. This reminds me of that time I flew to Cleveland two weeks ago.
.
.
.
.
.
#ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #travel #achd #medicaltravel #chdawareness #chronicillness #dtga #adultchdsurvivor #pacemakerlife #pacemakerclub #1in100
Hanging with my former office manager at the satel Hanging with my former office manager at the satellite location has made me realize that time marches on with or without us. Eventually we all move a little slower, our hair color fades, and our age begins to show, both inside and out. 
.
.
But age is just a number and a state of mind. Our people see past the surface and love what's underneath and that's really all that matters.
.
.
.
.
#goldenlily #goldenretrievers #goldenretrieverlove #goldenretrieversofinstagram #mansbestfriend #momsbestfriend #dogsofinstagram #instadogs #dogsofig #petsofohio #petsofinstagram #officedog #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki
Last appointment is an ECG, heart cath site check, Last appointment is an ECG, heart cath site check, and who know what else is planned? My doctors often joke they don't get to see me enough so when they have me, they want to spend as much time with me as they can. 🤣🤣 They are sooo lucky I like them!
.
.
.
.
#achd #congenitalheartdefect #adultchd #dtga #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #transpositionofthegreatarteries #achdvoices #1in100 #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #achdawareness #pacemakerlife #zippersister #pacemakerclub #adultchdsurvivor #chdvoices
Today i just tell you how tired I am because my br Today i just tell you how tired I am because my brain has forgotten how to function.
.
.
.
.
.
#achd #chdvoice #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #chdawareness #1in100 #congenitalheartdefect #adultchd #dtga #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #transpositionofthegreatarteries #anticoagulantes #achdvoices #voicesofchd #achdawareness #pacemakerclub #pacemakerlife
Quick update 9n injections and what's next. . . . Quick update 9n injections and what's next.
.
.
.
.
.
#achd #criticalcongenitalheartdefect #dtga #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #transpositionofthegreatarteries #dtga #adultchdsurvivor #pacemakerlife #chdawareness #afibawareness #heartfailure #chdsurvivor #pacemakerclub #chdvoice #1in100 #zippersister #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki
Have I ever told you how much I hate needles? If n Have I ever told you how much I hate needles? If not, let me explain.

A childhood of being poked, held down, crying over the feeling of a needle under my skin has left me traumatized to the point of even feeling lightheaded, dizzy, and nauseous at times. 

The very idea that I have to do this to myself twice a day for the next week makes me want to vomit. I begged them to not make me do it but when I told the NP how I felt, ugh... it was dismissed. 

Wasnt there another option? Apparently not as warfarin isn't reliable (current blood thinner) or so I have been told. 

I've been told this doesn't hurt and that I won't feel a thing but I've been lied to before.

If you don't hear from me in the morning, there's a good chance I fainted and cracked my head open on the floor.
.
.
.
.
.
#chdvoice #chdsurvivor #congenitalheartdefect #adultchdsurvivor #achd #anticoagulantes #lovenox #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #achdvoices #1in100 #zippersister #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #transpositionofthegreatarteries #dtga #TGA
Sadness is getting all comfortable and realizing y Sadness is getting all comfortable and realizing you need a drink of water and you left the water bottle on the other side of the room.
.
.
.
.
.
#chdawareness #chronicillness #chdsurvivor #congenitalheartdefect #adultchd #pacemakerlife #pacemakerclub #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #achdvoices #1in100 #dtga #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #transpositionofthegreatarteries #TGA
Load More Follow on Instagram

Footer

  • About this site
  • Advertising
    • Request a book review
  • Privacy Policy
  • Hire Me

Copyright 2006-2022 NLS Creative Privacy Policy