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You are here: Home / Uncategorized / My love hate-relationship with Alaska might be over

My love hate-relationship with Alaska might be over

By Know-it-All Nikki 2 Comments

Earlier this year I had a unique opportunity presented to me.

One of the Facebook groups I belong to helps writers connect to job opportunities. Some of the opportunities are full-time, in-person, or remote. Others are full-time, part-time, one-offs, remote, and freelance.

In the spring, an editor reached out looking for writers who live in or grew up in Alaska. Obviously, I raised my virtual hand and pitched the editor my story.

What came of that opportunity was writing about moving to Alaska and later on, writing about why I want to move back to Ohio.

It was an amazing opportunity in a few ways.

  • It was paid writing. (Yay money!)
  • It added two authored clips to my portfolio
  • It opens the door to more bylined opportunities with Insider.
  • It has helped change my perspective on living here.

Writing is cheaper than therapy

To those of you who know me, or follow my blog, know I have a love/hate relationship with Alaska, so you understand why I had to write these pieces.

Writing those two articles about living in Alaska was equally therapeutic and an understatement. Ever since we moved, I’ve struggled to love Alaska. It often felt like of all the people I’ve met in these last seven years, who have also moved here, I am the only one who feels negatively about life in the last frontier.

All those feelings came to the surface when I found out I was in heart failure. (I’m a firm believer that our mental health can and does have an impact on physical health so to suggest heart failure and extreme depression are linked is a no-brainer.)

Both Insider articles provided a very public stage for me to air my feelings. But they were also very healing.

  1. I no longer feel selfish for wanting to move back to Ohio.
  2. I don’t have this sense of wanting to blame Alaska for being, well… Alaska. It’s not the state’s fault.
  3. As difficult as it has been to adjust, I still found a way to settle in. I credit owning our home to part of that.
  4. I no longer want to rage against all the ways Alaska differs from the lower 48, or more specifically, my home state.
Image of a rock shaped like a heart in the sand.

Look for the lovely.

But there was another feeling I didn’t expect: comfort.

  • I now have a favorite coffee shop (they were my second favorite until the other one I loved closed during the pandemic).
  • My house makes me happy. I do wish Alaska had a lottery though so I could decorate and remodel the way I’d like to.
  • I really cannot complain about the weather. It’s the perfect mix of warm and cold in the summer and the winter is, well, winter. It’s cold and there’s never a lack of snow.
  • I will never get over how moose will just appear in our yard.
  • Or the peaceful feeling of sitting by the water.

Then there’s the feeling I never expected: reluctance.

If my world were perfect, I’d live in Ohio during the fall and winter (sorry Alaska, you cannot compete with Autumn in the Midwest) so I could be close to family during the holidays. But I would return to Alaska in the summer. I don’t like to sweat and my hair hates humidity.

To say I want to move back home and never return to Alaska would be a lie. What I’d really like is to be in two places at once… just kidding. (sort of.)

I want to enjoy both places and the things they have to offer.

Instead of retiring to Florida in my old age, I want to retire to Alaska. Is that too much to ask? Probably, but I’m pretty hell-bent on figuring it out.

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Heather

    November 17, 2022 at 4:54 pm

    I’m so glad you wrote this and that you and Alaska are loving each other now.

    Reply
    • Know-it-All Nikki

      November 18, 2022 at 10:37 am

      Love is a strong word. Mutual respect for one another feels more accurate LOL!

      Reply

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Hi there!

I’m Nikki and I’m thrilled to have you here. I’m powered by a good chai latte, loads of chocolate, and humor. Here at Know-it-all Nikki, I dish up honest conversations about self-care and mental health. I also share living with a congenital heart defect, my love of books, knitting, midlife, and life as a Buckeye exploring The Last Frontier. So, pull up a seat, grab your tea, and let’s spill some tea, have a lot of laughs, and a few good cries. To learn more about what makes me tick, CLICK HERE

knowitallnikki

Latest update. Things went well and I'm tolerating Latest update. Things went well and I'm tolerating the latest medication well so I can't argue too much. I just got back from my exercise stress test so I'm gonna need a nap.
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#chdvoice #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #ACHD #achdvoices #1in100 #congenitalheartdefect #transpositionofthegreatarteries #dtga #adultchdsurvivor #pacemakerlife #chdawareness #chronicillness #pacemakerclub #zippersister
Quick update: I'm feeling pretty good. The team he Quick update: I'm feeling pretty good. The team here at NCH wasted no time in knocking me out, doing the TEE and cardioverting me. I think all in all, I was in recovery by 10 a.m. 

I'll be spending the next couple of days in here while I start a new medication that is both a beta-blocker and anti-arrythmia. The goal there is to keep my blood pressure low and 🤞🏻🤞🏻 reduce my chances of more A-Fib episodes.

There is still lots more to share. We haven't even gotten to the micro bot part yet! 🤣🤣
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#chdvoice #chdsurvivor #pacemakerlife #chdawareness #afibawareness #heartfailure #dtga #adultchdsurvivor #achd #1in100 #congenitalheartdefect #transpositionofthegreatarteries #achdvoices #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki
How do you go into into Wednesday? With a jolt of How do you go into into Wednesday? With a jolt of electricity of course! I have a lot more information to share with you but there's soooo much. More updates later!
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#chdvoice #chdsurvivor #pacemakerlife #chdawareness #afibawareness #heartfailure #dtga #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #pacemakerlife #pacemakerclub #adultchdsurvivor #achd #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki
Instagram post 17974072760306846 Instagram post 17974072760306846
Last leg of the trip. Finally getting ready to boa Last leg of the trip. Finally getting ready to board the last flight. By the time I arrive it will be time for dinner. And sleep. Definitely sleep.
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#achd #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #achdvoices #chdvoice #chdsurvivor #pacemakerlife #chdawareness #afibawareness #heartfailure #dtga #adultchdsurvivor #transpositionofthegreatarteries #chdvoice
I just boarded the plane to start leg 2 of my trip I just boarded the plane to start leg 2 of my trip to Ohio. Currently in Anchorage and heading to Seattle. 
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#ACHD #achdvoices #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #travel #flywithme #chd #1in100 #nationalheartmonth #chdawareness #pacemakerlife #transpositionofthegreatarteries #dtga #adultchdsurvivor #chdvoice #pacemakerclub
On my way home to Ohio. This is how I leave Alaska On my way home to Ohio. This is how I leave Alaska. Two planes. Long layovers. 
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#ACHDVOICES #ACHDAdventuresWithNikki #travel #flywithme #chd #1in100 #nationalheartmonth #nationalhearthealthmonth #chdsurvivor #pacemakerlife #afib #afibawareness #chdawareness #pacemakerclub
Well, I watched the video on how to remove the @ge Well, I watched the video on how to remove the @getflipstik from the device. Needless to say, it did not go well. I was truly scared I was going to snap the top part in half or stab myself in the hand with it. Bleed out by cellphone stick/stand anyone?

Since it looks like the whole thing is ruined, this was not a great purchase. 
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#workedonsharktank #influencertested #influencernotapproved #flipstikfail #flipstik
In the clinic's defense, I did ask them to do it t In the clinic's defense, I did ask them to do it this way. But still...😖😖
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#achd #criticalcongenitalheartdefect #dtga #dextrotranspositionofthegreatarteries #pacemakerlife #chdawareness #chronicillness #chdsurvivor #congenitalheartdefect #adultchdwarrior #1in100 #chdvoice
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