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You are here: Home / Personal thoughts / Rcovering and waiting

Rcovering and waiting

By Know-it-All Nikki Leave a Comment

Ok, so surgery is finally over. I spent Monday night at the hospital and came home on Tuesday. I had a great nurse who really pointed me in the right direction concerning dumping all the breast milk I was pumping during my stay and I am so glad I took her advice. She really had the right idea and made sure I got in contact with the right person. Otherwise, my homecoming with Peanut could have been terrible. I couldn’t imagine coming home and dumping milk for another 24 hours while I had to give Peanut formula.
Don’t get me wrong, I have given my children formula but it was because I was under the impression that I could not successfully breastfeed only and hold a job. After a few years of knowledge and digging deeper, I find out that I have been wrong, I can do it. I just didn’t know how.
Now that I am home though, the recovery begins. Hard? Totally. I am not one to follow directions very well and I am very stubborn. For instance, if I feel like doing dishes, I am going to do them. So for me to sit idle for the next 6 weeks, I just can’t. I cannot expect everyone else to take over and handle all of these things. Maybe part of it is giving up control and I am just not good at that. I can expect The master and the hooligans to do so much. It’s not in me to be supermom, but it’s not in me to just watch the house flounder about. So I have to juggle taking care of myself and making sure I get the proper rest and not overdo things but at the same time pay attention to my house, children, and work. I haven’t written anything worth publishing for awhile and it’s starting to wear on me. I want to be doing more. I almost need to be doing more.

Filed Under: Personal thoughts Tagged With: Everything Else

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Hi there!

I’m Nikki and I’m thrilled to have you here. I’m powered by a good chai latte, loads of chocolate, and humor. Here at Know-it-all Nikki, I dish up honest conversations about life with adult congenital heart disease and mental health. I also share my love of books, knitting, midlife, and life after divorce. So, pull up a seat and grab a beverage. Let’s spill some tea, have a lot of laughs, and a few good cries. To learn more about what makes me tick, CLICK HERE

knowitallnikki

#writer 📲 #Binder #bookblogger #Knitter 🐑 💙 #chd #ACHD #TGA📧 hello@knowitallnikki.com 📸 ©️ @knowitallnikki


Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise.
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.
#c

Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise.
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.
.
.
#charliesworld #catstagram #instacats #catsofig #housecatlife


Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventi
Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventing me from filling it out, but he IS laying on the stickers I need to fill in the days and dates.
.
.
.
.
#charliesworld #instacats #catsofinstagram #catsofig #housecatlife catstagram


The world is falling apart.
The world is falling apart.


Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest
Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest. I've been trying to figure out how to write this for 2 months now and I still don't know if I got it right.
.
.
.
#knowitallnikkimovestoohio #dtga #heartmonth #ACHD #adultchdsurvivor


Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting
Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting Impact) and day 5 (How We Monitorthe Heart)! But it's fine! Because they both fit nicely for today's adventures which consisted of a carotid artery ultrasound (day 5) and a series of messages between myself and @nationwidekids to discuss how best to approach the weight loss struggle (day 4). 🤨😠

But it also ties in beautifully with day 6 of #heartmonth, #choosingjoy because despite all of the crap that goes along with being an adult with CHD, I am genuinely joyful. Some of comes out in sarcasm but I've told people if I'm not cracking jokes or inserting some token sarcasm into the day, then something is truly wrong. The last 2 years have been hard, but believe me when I say, I AM HAPPY and I'm wearing red today!
.
.
.
.
#ACHD #congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #WearRedforHeartMonth


I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth i
I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth is #lifebetweenappointments 

Yeesh, where do I start? Right now my life between appointments is a little chaotic. The number of appointments has increased a thousand fold than what I was used to growing up.  There are more appointments now than I had when I was pregnant with all four kids!

I struggle to keep them straight or where they're going to be. I write them down in a paper planner, my wall calendar, and my phone's calendar. And I still wind up looking them up multiple times because I don't trust my brain's ability to recall.

I'm expected to write down detailed symptoms. I don't recognize symptoms as symptoms. It just feels like a Tuesday to me. But do try to have a normal life, the docs encourage: eat right, be active, get sleep. How do I do that and not wonder if what I'm feeling while I'm trying to be normal is a symptom?
.
.
.
.
#heartfailure #congestiveheartfailure #congenitalheartdefect


Waiting.
.
.
.
#catsofinstagram #charliesworld #in

Waiting.
.
.
.
#catsofinstagram #charliesworld #instacats #catsofig #catstagram


Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I c
Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I can say, is sometimes motivation feels like the end of a very long tunnel; a pinprick of light in an otherwise black abyss. Motivation eludes me more than I care to admit. When it feels unattainable I feel like the little girl I used to be, opening my eyes in a pitch black room, are my eyes actually open? Making my way across the room, arms outstretched, hoping I don't run into anything, or worse, fall. 
And then other times, like on this Monday, motivation arrives and it feels easy, like a special occasion you'vebeen waiting for. So you wear the anatomical heart earrings your daughter bought you and you don the gifted knit heart cowl your knitty BFF made for you and for a day you feel normal.
.
.
.
.
#congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #congestiveheartfailure #dtga


Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I st
Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I still think it's silly to only give one day, one month, or even one week to talk about heart disease. Alas, here we are. 

I'm going to do my best to follow the 28 daily prompts for #heartdisease and #chdawareness but I make no promises.

Today's prompt is #BeyondtheDiagnosis. To me, looking beyond being born with a CHD means a few things:

It's the invisible things that can't be measured on a chart, like the fatigue, sadness for the health I wasn't born with, and the mental math of asking myself if I have enough energy for all I want to get accomplished in a week, or even a day.

It's being seen as a whole person; not the condition the doctors are treating. This a part of me, not all of me. I'm still a parent, friend, writer, a hopeless romantic. Yes, I'm a heart patient, I ALWAYS will be, but I'm also opinionated, stubborn, funny, and a person with real feelings. 

But most of all it's refusing to be reduced to number in the healthcare system, or someone else's discomfort.
.
.
.
#chdawareness



Follow on Instagram


knowitallnikki

#writer 📲 #Binder #bookblogger #Knitter 🐑 💙 #chd #ACHD #TGA📧 hello@knowitallnikki.com 📸 ©️ @knowitallnikki

Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise. . . . . #c Ok, okay, I won't go anywhere. Promise.
.
.
.
.
#charliesworld #catstagram #instacats #catsofig #housecatlife
Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventi Technically, he's not ON my planner, thus preventing me from filling it out, but he IS laying on the stickers I need to fill in the days and dates.
.
.
.
.
#charliesworld #instacats #catsofinstagram #catsofig #housecatlife catstagram
The world is falling apart. The world is falling apart.
Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest Head to the blog (link in bio) and read the latest. I've been trying to figure out how to write this for 2 months now and I still don't know if I got it right.
.
.
.
#knowitallnikkimovestoohio #dtga #heartmonth #ACHD #adultchdsurvivor
Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting Well poop, I missed day 4 (Early Answers, Lasting Impact) and day 5 (How We Monitorthe Heart)! But it's fine! Because they both fit nicely for today's adventures which consisted of a carotid artery ultrasound (day 5) and a series of messages between myself and @nationwidekids to discuss how best to approach the weight loss struggle (day 4). 🤨😠

But it also ties in beautifully with day 6 of #heartmonth, #choosingjoy because despite all of the crap that goes along with being an adult with CHD, I am genuinely joyful. Some of comes out in sarcasm but I've told people if I'm not cracking jokes or inserting some token sarcasm into the day, then something is truly wrong. The last 2 years have been hard, but believe me when I say, I AM HAPPY and I'm wearing red today!
.
.
.
.
#ACHD #congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #WearRedforHeartMonth
I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth i I almost missed it, day 3 prompt for #heartmonth is #lifebetweenappointments 

Yeesh, where do I start? Right now my life between appointments is a little chaotic. The number of appointments has increased a thousand fold than what I was used to growing up.  There are more appointments now than I had when I was pregnant with all four kids!

I struggle to keep them straight or where they're going to be. I write them down in a paper planner, my wall calendar, and my phone's calendar. And I still wind up looking them up multiple times because I don't trust my brain's ability to recall.

I'm expected to write down detailed symptoms. I don't recognize symptoms as symptoms. It just feels like a Tuesday to me. But do try to have a normal life, the docs encourage: eat right, be active, get sleep. How do I do that and not wonder if what I'm feeling while I'm trying to be normal is a symptom?
.
.
.
.
#heartfailure #congestiveheartfailure #congenitalheartdefect
Waiting. . . . #catsofinstagram #charliesworld #in Waiting.
.
.
.
#catsofinstagram #charliesworld #instacats #catsofig #catstagram
Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I c Day 2 of #heartmonth is #motivationmonday. All I can say, is sometimes motivation feels like the end of a very long tunnel; a pinprick of light in an otherwise black abyss. Motivation eludes me more than I care to admit. When it feels unattainable I feel like the little girl I used to be, opening my eyes in a pitch black room, are my eyes actually open? Making my way across the room, arms outstretched, hoping I don't run into anything, or worse, fall. 
And then other times, like on this Monday, motivation arrives and it feels easy, like a special occasion you'vebeen waiting for. So you wear the anatomical heart earrings your daughter bought you and you don the gifted knit heart cowl your knitty BFF made for you and for a day you feel normal.
.
.
.
.
#congenitalheartdefectsurvivor #congestiveheartfailure #dtga
Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I st Today kicks off the first day of #heartmonth. I still think it's silly to only give one day, one month, or even one week to talk about heart disease. Alas, here we are. 

I'm going to do my best to follow the 28 daily prompts for #heartdisease and #chdawareness but I make no promises.

Today's prompt is #BeyondtheDiagnosis. To me, looking beyond being born with a CHD means a few things:

It's the invisible things that can't be measured on a chart, like the fatigue, sadness for the health I wasn't born with, and the mental math of asking myself if I have enough energy for all I want to get accomplished in a week, or even a day.

It's being seen as a whole person; not the condition the doctors are treating. This a part of me, not all of me. I'm still a parent, friend, writer, a hopeless romantic. Yes, I'm a heart patient, I ALWAYS will be, but I'm also opinionated, stubborn, funny, and a person with real feelings. 

But most of all it's refusing to be reduced to number in the healthcare system, or someone else's discomfort.
.
.
.
#chdawareness
Follow on Instagram

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